Look, I’m not here to ruin your Friday night. I love a good fish and chips as much as the next person—ask my arteries, they’d confirm. But the key is frequency and method. Instead of deep-frying, try air-frying (which uses 70–80% less oil) or baking with a light spray. You still get crunch, but without the gluttony hangover.
When you do indulge, pair your fried food with something raw and fibrous—a cold salad, some cucumber sticks, or a handful of nuts. This helps slow down the absorption of fat and sugar. And please, for the love of your liver, don’t make it a nightly habit. Your future self (and your gut) will thank you.
So next time you’re holding a cold mozzarella stick at midnight, just ask yourself: “Is this worth the silent judgment of my microbiome?” Probably not. But hey, if you do eat it—live your truth. Just maybe drink a glass of water and take a walk afterward. I’ll be right there with you, regretting my own life choices. We’re in this together.
