There’s a fish called the blobfish that looks like a grumpy grandpa made of sad gelatin. It lives so deep underwater that it would explode in your hand if you brought it to the surface. Pro tip: don’t hug a blobfish.
Then there’s the parrotfish, which produces coral sand—every day, a parrotfish poops out a cloud of beach. So when you’re lying on a tropical shore, you’re basically relaxing on fish butt. You’re welcome.
And the archerfish hunts by shooting a jet of water at bugs. It’s the only fish that has perfect aim—which means it’s secretly better at darts than your uncle Stan.
Are There Even “Real” Fish?
Scientists now say “fish” is a polyphyletic mess, which is fancy talk for “we have no idea.” Technically, a lobe-finned fish like the coelacanth is closer to you and me than it is to a salmon. Yes, you share a great-great-great-great-grandfish with a coelacanth. Try that fact at a dinner party.
Fish Characteristics
Even cartilaginous fish—sharks, rays, and skates—are weird uncles in this family. Shark skeletons are made of cartilage, like your ear. So a shark is basically a giant, toothy ear that ate too many seals.
